Scratch scratch

Itchy

Scratch all day and scratch all night
All these darn mosquito bites.
There’s just no way to settle the score
I walk outside and boom, there’re more.
Few others are as savory as me
Guess I’m just a delicacy.
Every year, it’s such a bummer
But without it, wouldn’t be summer.

~aowam

Figures the day I have to go back to work (had yesterday off) I slept reallllly well with favorable dreams. My extended weekend was unremarkable. Mostly video game playing (no costume stuff done at all….), entertained friend and her bf for a minor amount of time, took Gable to the vet, ate a ton of junk food, ferried my mom to her eye appointment, and spent money.

At least my patio debt is gone! WHOOOOO. Now the fridge debt is almost done too! On to the next one! Or better yet, let’s try and save something…though I might not be able to because my mom needs to go to the premier eye facility in the region…she has hereditary macular degeneration, specifically the cones are messed up in the macula. Explains why she confuses color and sees halos. They need to do gene therapy and no one takes her insurance, so basically we’ll be paying it out of pocket. I will be helping if it comes to it, which I’m sure it will. What this also means is that I have something really fun to look forward to! How exciting! This is an instance where I’d like more dark blood, thank you.

Stupid HOA never got back to us about the tree. If you don’t WANT to take it over email, then at least TELL US THAT. How idiotic. It’s still splitting at an alarming rate. More money there.

SO MUCH RAIN. This can’t be good for any of the plants (except grasses). Every week it’s rain rain rain. I’ve dumped water out of pots so often it’s crazy, and the spider popluation has exploded in response to the mosquito population.

Spent last night refreshing my information about the eye in the physiology textbook I bought myself last year. When my mom told me what they diagnosed, it amazed me how much I retained from my studies all those years ago. I really and truly was fascinated by the human body and how it works, so much of what I learned has remained with me all this time. I was able to explain to her in the car, what was going on, the difference between glaucoma and macular degeneration, what the macula is, etc.

It’s my creed: learn how things work and then you’ll be able to identify the problem, understand why something is going wrong and subsequently have an idea of how to fix them. Works for all aspects of life. That and my other creed of: Moderation in all things. That. Is learning. Always learn. Know. Analyze. Comprehend. But be willing to amend that information because research changes knowledge all the time.

Dangit. Time to go.

Is it bad

that I don’t even want to read the news headlines?

It’s finally Friday! I swore up and down that yesterday was Friday…you know how that goes. I am thankful, however, that everyone is on vacation this week. Traffic has been so light. I wish it could stay like this forever. Probably won’t get this kind of mileage for again until the next big holiday.

Tomorrow I plan on moving forward with a test piece for Gable’s samurai coat costume. Monday saw me cutting out a pattern on doggie pee pads. Lol. Not only were they the biggest piece of something I could find, but they’re tough with little risk of ripping. He is not a big fan of being a model for fabric especially during the time he usually naps. There is still part of the design I have to mess with (the shoulder part for the coat) to make it look closer to authentic, but I think I have an idea of how to do it. The “armor” I made last October out of cardboard is still slated to be used with it, but I am still super unhappy about how working with cardboard looks. I mean, it’s corrugated and reflects light in strange places…and it looks like it was made from cardboard. I wonder if I can remake them with foam…which presents its own problems. We shall see how much time I have. The helmet was the hardest part which is why I originally chose cardboard. Not sure how I can do the same thing with foam. Foam helmets are literally the hardest part conceptually. Apart from carving it from a block of Styrofoam, making it symmetrical is hard but shaping it is the worst. I’m a bit excited, though.

Made an appointment for Gable to go to the vet Monday. I shall be poor yet again. Sigh. I tried their advertised “make an appointment online!” thing and OMG what a slow system!! It was awful. I spent an hour the night before trying to mess with it and it was just impossible, so I was like, whatever, I’ll just call. Lo and behold when I called the next day, it was NOTHING like what the system told me. It informed me that Saturday had lots of appointments available, but the girl told me, nope, all booked. Then it had told me there was no openings on Monday and the ones available were with a doctor I didn’t want (I like most of them, but not her…interestingly the doctor that my greyhound mentor adores), but upon calling I got a doctor I liked. Wut. So much simpler, so much faster.

Finished the last day of cat-taking-care-of. He is so cute, I’m so glad we were able to find the source of the incessant and ear-splitting beeping going on in the house. How very obnoxious for an animal with more keen senses than ours! His zoomies were very spirited and fast! He also reallllllly liked my brother for some reason, and used me as a bridge to balance on and get to him. I made up a game with him where I’d fake a mouse burrowing under the blankets and popping out every so often and he just LOVES it. It could be anything, not a mouse, and he was completely intrigued. As much as he set off my allergies, I’m going to miss him.

Doggone it

I forgot to cut my nails and it’s Tuesday again! I can’t just go cut them now because working dentistry and fresh cut nails don’t go together. Guh. Will have to do after work.

Speaking of after work, I am taking care of a cat for my friend while she is away. Sat through yesterday was fine, but starting today I’m a little concerned because I won’t be able to get there until late. Today and tomorrow will be fine, but Thursday…………….

Things to do before beach trip: make Gable’s vet appointment and be prepared for another chunk of money lost, pack things, get items from other house (which I straight up forgot in my exhausted state). Reef-safe sunscreen: check! Expensive stuff, let me tell you. Hope that I still fit in my swim-stuff.

I spent Sunday and especially yesterday walking around like a zombie owing to muscle pain, but I found my eclipse glasses! At Walmart! Aaaand I’m glad I dragged my mom with me because we found sunglasses to go to the beach with! I’d forgotten all about it since I broke my old ones. It’s got to be genetic, too, this inability of mine to mop up lactic acid buildup in my muscles. Debilitating! And these days it’s not the second day for the most pain, it’s the third. That is my new standard for someone coming out of youth. I learned that from my patient. Quads and hands, mostly. The sunburn is unnoticeable unless I’m leaning up against something.

Did you know that squirrels are interested in laser pointers too and will follow them? Also, I think my cat allergy is getting worse. It didn’t bother me the first day or two, but I’ve progressively shown more signs of it the more I time I spend with the kitty. Who is adorable btw.

Why don’t I ever sleep well when I have to go to work? At least this weekend will be longer. Must make vet appointment this week.

In other news I bought a cheap semi-rigid endoscope from Amazon. MWAHAHAHA. It works really well when I fed it into the interior areas of my car, but it has trouble focusing well in some instances. Also it doesn’t fit in my ear. Darn. I don’t expect much given how cheap it was, but the lack of focus is a little disappointing and leaves you wanting. However it will be useful for finding items in little places, plain old curiosity, seeing things behind my neck, or even magnifying small text. Too bad my phone is too high tech for it. What limits are there for something like this? HAHAHA. Did you know that a closeup of your auricle is weird? They’re strangely pitted. Mine has some sort of large pit/scab on it.

 

Snapshot000000

I can look at the far reaches of his mouth with this! Quality isn’t too bad, yeah?

Snapshot000002

Yes, this is the inside of my left nostril. VERY COOL. 

 

 

 

Sunday!

Came back from a Saturday of marathon yardwork with a killer sunburn! Woohoo!

When I came down I was immediately overwhelmed by what a disaster it all had become. Weed-choked beds and weeds galore. The mulch I worked hard on last year? Completely overrun. The plan was to take advantage of this one beautiful Saturday that wasn’t raining to try and at least get the grass killing down because the fence doesn’t rely on heat and sun. And glorious is truly was: gorgeous high of 83 with a moderate breeze and just enough clouds. So I started by commandeering the lawnmower to do it right this time by cutting the grass down as far as it would go before laying down the mulch and landscaping fabric for maximum heat damage. That lawnmower is awesome! Except that the batteries last a total of 10 minutes or so, less if the grass is really thick. Very frustrating. Good thing I don’t plan on owning the house longer than the beginning of next year, because a riding lawnmower would be necessary, and subsequently the dreaded gasoline. The lawn being all weeds didn’t make me feel too terribly bad because if you looked around the neighborhood very few lawns survived this year, but the unkempt factor was annoying. Whatever. I set to work right away (traffic had been so bad it took me forever to start and I had planned on starting earlier before the sun got too high), rolling out landscaping fabric, lofty goals in mind. Ran out, so I made the mulch/fabric/pin run. A guy looked at my items and said to me, “heck of a job for a Saturday,” and I was like, “it’s a nice day.” Same guy smiled knowingly and pityingly at me during checkout. 19 bags later I went back out to finish landscape-fabric-ing and uh oh, the sun was getting bad. But it was OK! Because I didn’t have much of a choice! And there was a breeze!

The difference between this year and last year’s workings

Guhhhhhhhhhhh. The weeds are choking out a tomato plant

By the time I got to spreading the first load of mulch, I was already done for and the expansiveness of the yard hit me hard. Not only did I have but 1/4 of the mulch I actually needed, I could tell my strength was fading and fast. Extremely hot and tired, I came stumbled in around 3pm (I started at 10:30am) and while downing my 2nd Vita Coco stolen from the fridge (water wasn’t anywhere near cutting it), and told my brother in law that I really and truly needed them to buy mulch and spread it for me before the side I prepped turned into the other side. Then I made my way tiredly out to my car, not caring what the heck I was wearing or how I smelled, to buy the second load. This time pushing the cart full of mulch bags was much harder and much less fun. While waiting for my turn at checkout, a couple behind me asked me what case my phone was in. I turned slowly, Ganado-style, and slowly reached for my phone which took 2 tries (I usually stick my phone in the left back and my wallet in the right back), and showed them. He asked if I could sit on my phone without breaking it and I joked that I’ve been sitting on it and we all laughed. The whole time I was frantically hoping in my head that they wouldn’t think I was drunk, possibly having a stroke, but not drunk. Then it was my turn to checkout. Driving home slowly, I unloaded 2 loads, smaller ones because I knew I was quickly fading and still had to spread it. Took some time to put my rocks down around the drainage thing, and frustratingly realized in my addled state that of all the rocks to choose from I chose the one size that would slide willingly into the drain. Figures. I might as well be drunk, holy crap.

Only one more load left (5 bags) I went into the house because I thought I was going to die and needed to rest for a little. Grabbed a new Vita Coco, and went over to my dog’s bed to just lie down for a quickie. I felt my eyes close as my butt hit the ground and as I lay back, Gable barked hard at me before coming to lick my face–something he never does, ever. I could feel Liana lay down on my other side and he wouldn’t stop licking me until I sat up. Right then and there I was revived. I had a surge of energy. It was powerful, having my dogs attentive to my health like that. From 2 dogs that I suspect are ailing from old people stuff. Gable just the other night and morning was displaying more dementia-like symptoms. Liana, I think is intermittently incontinent. I told him that I only have one more and I need to do it so we can go home because otherwise I would crash and never make it back. Like the little engine that could, I kept saying to myself, you can do it. 5 more bags. That’s it. Let’s do this. When it was over, I summoned the last of my strength to take the last wagon-walk back and then grabbed my stuff (slowly) to leave. Talked to my brother in law for a bit and then left. Made it home, finally, and took my long awaited shower ( I knew if I had taken it there I’d never want to drive back). That’s when my next task came: go take care of friend’s cat.

Thankfully, my family called me then to ask what to have for dinner because I hadn’t even thought of food. See, in this instance I am very glad to have someone take care of stuff like dinner and dishes for me. It occurred to me I hadn’t even eaten all day long.

Then we found out about my sunburn. Ouch. Spray sunscreen is great except for on your back. Lotion FTW there. Geez. I hadn’t worn a tank top in years and BOOM there you go. These days I’m so much more comfortable with shorts and tank tops, all thanks to the IPL and possibly old age. Haha. So exhausted, I went to bed around 9pm and ended up on my phone with my brain in full alert mode for an hour. Of course.

Woke up exactly the same time I wake up every day and I could feel my body was going to me unhappy. Ouchies. Not NEARLY as bad as Old Rag, though. I am so proud of myself and glad that my physical state has not deteriorated like that again. Phew! It’s tired and achy, but I can walk and put on my underpants. Definitely could lose some fat, however…

Sunday! A good day to veg out! Or do crafty stuff!

Tuesday again!

Making homemade fried chicken tonight. We can’t drink milk, and what makes fried chicken so good is the fact that it always has buttermilk in it. I never knew what buttermilk is so I looked it up and basically it’s spoiled milk. Milk that is sour. So began my Sunday quest for almond milk which meant that ended up buying 10 more items than I intended which is exactly why I try not to go to Target. -_-;; Anyways, as I’ve learned over the years of cooking, chicken and poultry in general does not absorb marinade quickly like beef does, so it has been in marinade for the last 48 hours. I am excited.

I know I promised to stay away from the fried chicken in respect for the Chicken this year, but I think I figured out why it’s angry…I had gotten a little greyhound statue and put it on the porch and named it…Boubar. Boubar is rightfully a chicken’s name. I am currently on a quest to find a legitimate and appropriate chicken statue to place out there and assign the proper name, but it’s amazingly difficult to find one.

One of my scores from Target, however, was Ever Oasis, a new game for 3DS. It’s not an established series and honestly I don’t even know the company that made it, but the premise sounded great and I am desperately in need of something new and exciting. New indeed! Finally an original game not based off of anything, with a new world, new gameplay, new everything! So far I love it. It’s like a mix of Rune Factory town micromanaging, real time monster fighting like Children of Mana, you can have a team up to 3 players and there are dungeons to explore! A bit like Golden Sun too where you need certain abilities to access areas in the map. I think I’m about 70% done with the game.

This PMS this month has been ridiculous. I must be super fertile this go-round. Not only emotionally am I feeling it, but I feel FAT, I want fried food, and my skin is secreting a crazy amount of oil which means, pimples. Everywhere. My desire to forage and gather is also tremendous!! And let’s not mention my temper. Good golly.

Speaking of temper, I find it absolutely amazing, if not short of a miracle, how much I’ve chilled out. Part of it feels like, I’m too old and it requires too much energy to care about so and so, and the other part of it is simply, it really does not matter. My life fire is starting to burn evenly and looks like it’s only going to diminish from here on out. 30. Such an interesting year so far.

Ever since I organized my room yesterday, my skin stopped crawling as much and the allergies mostly left me. Darn dust mites. It’s weird, as I get older, I find that I’m less allergic to pollen as more allergic to dust. Still allergic to mold, but the dust is the real killer for me.

I was very productive on Sunday as I resolved to be: baked things, made Jello, cleaned my room, spent a frustratingly long time trying to fix the shelf in the kitchen which was literally being held up by a sandwich container (my shoulders are much too wide to fit in tiny spaces like that anymore…10 years ago that would have been easy…it’s amazing how much you grow in your 20s…not up, though, only out, lol), spent money, marinade, found my DS, aaaaaaand…then played Ever Oasis. lol.

Did you know that TeeFury sells posters? Really cool ones too.

Cystic type pimples are the worst. They are so PAINFUL.

Beach in one month!

Gorgeous day!

70 degrees F on a summer morning in July? Yes! Time to head to the park with the puppers! We went yesterday already and usually that’s it for a weekend but I couldn’t pass up going again today. Part for them, and part for me. Nothing like getting out there are just being in nature and nice weather and such. Plus more cardio is always good. The old pups…I don’t know how much longer I’ll have with them…whether it be several more years or just a few months. They love it, so who am I to deny that? Good thing we went early, though, because it started really heating up as we left. Other people seemed to have the same idea as us, because as we were leaving we encountered 5 dogs coming in. All young, of course. Normally my dogs are great when other dogs go by, but I think it depends on the day…Gable out of the blue decides to lunge happily at one of the dogs and it was scared…guh. Then the others he just walked by because I gave him the look. 

In other news, some follicles down in the nether regions got massively blocked overnight (or maybe even through yesterday) and I woke up to ridiculous pain whenever I move that extends to my upper thigh. It’s so big it took over several follicles at once. TMI, I know. When I saw it, all I could think of was, “DAMN THAT’S BIG.” Ouch. ouch. ouch. I’m about 90% sure it’s from my ballooning weight and the fact that my capris were way too tight to be wearing them all day yesterday. They used to fit fine…MUST LOSE WEIGHT.

Remember that Gillette BRAUN IPL I bought from Amazon? Now that I’ve had it for about a year, I can safely recommend it. I know that 9 months ago I was busy complaining about how it didn’t work for me, but a year later, there is enough difference for me to finally wear short leg clothing regularly…something I haven’t done in my life since before I started shaving. My legs have less hair and less growth. I shave about once a week and the hair is very short when I do it. How much less hair? At least 60-70% less hair in general. Armpits….not as good. I think there are too many folds and such. Maybe you need 2 people to do it just to stretch the skin. Some have gone for good, but overall I haven’t had much success there. My knuckle hair (mine are akin to male hair growth there…) has been positively affected (less hair and growth) too. If I were to buy again, and these things eventually do need to be replaced, I’d try Remington’s version with safe face feature.

Yesterday I rescued a praying mantis from inside church. It has been a lonnnnnng time since I’ve held a full grown praying mantis in my hands. It was a very bright green with these big eyes. I didn’t want anyone stomping on it. Wish I’d had my phone on me to take a picture. Not sure why, but it made me so happy to see one.

Gable feet.

Brought Liana to the vet for a tech vaccine visit. She greatly dislikes going now and was loudly telling everyone about that as we were waiting. Then 2 more dogs come in and amongst 4 dogs it was like a dog choir in there. It was quite funny to me. She really likes other dogs. Very stubborn pupper though.

What to make for dinner tonight…I haven’t really had to cook in a while.

 

You Know It’s Summer

…when the hits to my stingray post goes off the charts. I can’t possibly be the only site to have information on it, right? At this point I have so many comments on the entry it’s like being in a forum. It’s great, though, to gather all of that information. One day maybe it will be useful for something more official. I hate re-reading the post, though, because it has to be one of the most poorly written blog entries I’ve ever done. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve edited it and I’m still unhappy. Then again, it is rather fun to go back through it because I’ve since forgotten the little details of the ordeal. I remember that it happened, but not the nitty gritty, nor what the wound looked like. Always an OMG GEEZ every time I see it and it all comes flooding back. Ah. Memories.

Speaking of memories, I wish he would just hurry up and set up a time to get his stuff back from me. I’m sure he’s completely forgotten about me and everything, given that I know that he’s the kind of person who would just prefer to erase all prior information rather than having to think about it again. Heck, he didn’t much think of me when we were together, so why would he now? I’m doing so much better about it all, not only am I relieved, but I’m proud of myself, to boot. Maybe he’s trying to avoid it. Well no matter what, I decided I can’t truly move on until he gets what’s his. No hard feelings or anything. I still wear the shirts he gave me and use the bottle and will continue to use the Yak-Trax. No point in erasing possibly painful memories–my memory is too good for that and in the end I don’t need to forget. That would be running away from my problems and I, years ago, resolved to stop running and to face them in order to overcome and grow from the experience. No need to be mad because once again it keeps me fettered and I need to free myself. Peace. Zen. Grudges, lingering resentment…they do nothing and only weigh one down. Accept, encompass, neutralize and keep them as trophies. Macrophage style. I can look at fire trucks now, firefighters shopping at the grocery store, and auto places without that pang of pain and anger.

Actually, I swear that poem I posted pushed me over the top of the depression pit. Interesting how my venting and channeling has changed over the years, and yet it remains something from the creative world.

I am so poor. I can’t even…Bah. This beach trip is super killer, but when I look at it, we’re doing it for my dogs and grandparents. All elderly. Haha…it’s worth it, though. Really. You don’t understand until you see how my dogs react to the beach (or any road trip/vacation, really) and similarly my grandparents’ reaction to this beach we’re going to. Pure bliss, low pressure, true relaxation, lost in the wonder of nature and life. Unless there are hurricanes. But. We’ll deal with that when we get to it haha. When they’re all gone and we look back on it, I’ll be able to say with conviction that they were happy…very happy when they were with us…and in the end, that’s all that matters in life, isn’t it: to be happy. When you’re on your deathbed, or staring death in the face with your life flashing before you, how much happiness can you say you’ve achieved in the journey? For different people happiness comes from different sources, it’s not all the same, but will you be happy or will you have an overload of regrets?

Personally, I’d rather not have to remain a ghost with unfinished business. If I died tomorrow, I wouldn’t be too sad. I haven’t lived too terribly long in this world, and I have things I still want to achieve, do, and I still have those I love relying on me, but overall I can say, yes, I’ve lived a happy life. I’ve been blessed, though I’m always complaining about being stuck and taking hits from all sides. I’ve had many experiences, sad, bad, traumatic, painful, happy, amazing, content, loving, fun…all worth experiencing. I’d like to have many more and new ones!  But if it’s time to go, then so be it. I’d just worry about my loved ones.

Wow that tone changed quickly. Work tomorrow! After this week, then a week off!