Friday

These day posts are starting to get old, huh?

Yesterday morning was just awful. She was miserable, I was miserable and Gable continued to act like she wasn’t even existing. It got so bad I thought hard about calling the vet to make the decision to put her down. Even if she had shown interest in food and water (despite not eating anyways) she was in a lot of pain. I started feeling awful and powerless because I couldn’t do anything to help her. However, I was waiting for the vet to call anyways with bloodwork results, so I thought I’d wait until then. It was a sunny day so I let them outside and sat there with them a little before letting them do their thing (she never liked me sitting out there with them). She seemed so happy, watching the leaves fall, the birds fly, hear them sing, listen to the work guys next door and the sun shining on them. Then the vet called and I was sad, but turns out it was just the receptionist asking if everything was OK.

I played video games all day, sad, but then around 2/3ish she started perking up. She barked at a dog walking outside. She realized she could sit up without crying out in pain so she assumed the position she likes the most. Everything really started looking up when she reached around to lick her bottom. My heart lightened.

Then that evening my mom helped me walk them because Gable needed a longer walk. She tried hard, really hard, to keep walking with us. Then she pooped! That made me soooo happy! SHe still kept wanting to go to the trees, though.

Last night, I was able to sleep a lot more. She still whimpered and whined most of the night. At one point she startled awake, stood there a bit and decided to run up the stairs which shot me out of sleep. I stood at the bottom of the stairs and she came back down. It was like she woke up and thought she was supposed to be upstairs, not realizing I was still down there. She lay down again and I tried to sleep, but I hear a small yelp and turn to see her roaching!!! I had to go rub her belly then and got back onto the couch. I could hear her flop over and she proceeded to melt off the bed like she usually does until she gets up and goes to sleep again.

On the walk this morning she pooped again, but then here comes the worrisome part: It was wet and runny and she’d walk a few steps and try to poop a few drips, walk and drip and walk nd drip. We walked slowly and when we turned around, she tried to poop water again, except this time she couldn’t get her behind to stand up. Multiple times. I had to help. Came home, she wanted to see squirrels and got inside and up ok.

I was happy but worried again. Her spirits are high, but is her body failing more? She’s obviously not feeling pain as much. No matter what she needs to eat. And she did.

This is so hard. If she degrades more tomorrow, I’m going to have to make the call. We decided that because I need to make sure she doesn’t run around like she did last night, I’m not going to my grandma’s bday party tomorrow. The rear end weakness worries me a lot. I’m hoping it was just pain from the diarrhea.

She’s also starting to decide that she doesn’t want the medicine. I don’t think the side effects are fair for her to keep using them long term.

In other news, though, Gable acknowledged her this morning by smelling her butt. He always smells her butt, but he hadn’t done it the last few days. To me that means that she stopped wishing to die, but I know that she knows that the end is still hovering. She’s constantly whining like she wants to go do something. All night long. Like she realizes her time is short. On a normal day they’re always always sleeping, so there’s no real difference there.I am more and more convinced that it truly is a spine problem and not a muscle thing. That means that there is no real treatment besides costly surgery.

My baby girl. I’m glad you feel better and more comfortable.

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