Dad Troubles

Trouble and heartache all come at once don’t they?

My dad is a monster. Evil lurks in his heart. We continually joke about “Dark Blood” which we decided I have the most of. He’s been finding any little thing to roast my mom on AGAIN. Then he sends a veiled but threatening nonetheless letter in order to get a rise out of her, and of course it works. My brother too, who tries as hard as possible to distance himself from all of this. Sent me a picture of the letter yesterday while I was at work which riled ME up because it made me MAD, but that gave me time to think the situation through a bit. When dealing with my dad, you need to be as robotic as possible. You cover every single base you have and more, just in case. Make an airtight environment for yourself. He likes to think that he’s really clever but he has little control over his emotions, so it always comes through incriminatingly. So in order to retaliate, you need to remain as completely emotionless as possible, while making sure your case is solid with backups.

Unfortunately my mom is nowhere like that. He is and always has been paranoid that she’s lying about money and always hiding things from him and actually has another man who gives her money, but that’s only because he’s the conniving one so would naturally assume everyone is as base as he is. If you know my mom, you would know that she is the most painfully honest people you’ll ever meet. Pure and free from those kind of thoughts. In fact she is rather incapable of deceit. Couldn’t lie properly to save her life. My brother is like her quite a bit, but he has the benefit of me teaching him the  way of the Dark Blood. Plus he has some in him. Anyways she writes this reply to send back to him and asked me to look it over. Tells me that she “doesn’t want to provoke him” and I read it and am like, GUH. It is extremely provoking. I have to re-write the whole thing. You one up him. You don’t fall into the same category. You save your trump cards until you need them and that’s if he does intend to go to court. Your letter is written in order to stand up in court as in-incriminating as possible. As neutral as possible.

I got word from one of my cousins from that side that she’d heard he was trying to make life as difficult as possible for my mom. Obviously that meant he had been boasting about his schemes and how proud of them he was/is. That was one word, but I informed my sister and she confirmed she’d heard the same from a different cousin who was present at the time. His own sister reprimanded him severely for it calling him shameful and now they don’t talk. This is someone who claimed to have “loved” my mom for 25 years? And he doesnt even know anything about her let alone any of us. In fact he disowned all of us. 

It’s been 7 freaking years ok? Shows you what kind of mental problems HE has. I understand it in part because since we do share so much genetic material I suffer from it too. However, I’m not 100%. If that’s the case I should feel bad for him right? Nope. He has the power to end it. Instead he decides to contine with it. He’s had much longer in life to overcome said issues than I have had, but I’m winning in control. Everyone thinks the same about him. 

I may not understand depression but I do understand obsession. Well. Unfortunately. Though I’ve heard obsession predisposes depression. I guess I could see that, but our obsession is an anger obsession so instead of spiraling down it more often comes out as an action. Therefore this affliction needs a vent, a channel, or it will explode.

We’ll never be rid of him. Even if we stop alimony altogether and give him a million dollars to choke on and die on since he loves money so much, the worse fear is without the alimony as a vent he’ll come blow us all away. That is not an exaggeration, by the way. It’s a real fear. He’s crazy. Right before we left my mom was sure he was trying to kill her or was close to doing something drastic. Having been there myself, I fully believe it. I could write a novel on what he did to us back then, but 95% of people who hear just a glimpse of it think I am exaggerating. I am not. Can’t make that stuff up, you know? Even my mom’s lawyer didn’t believe her until the very first meeting with the man. Then he came out, flopped on the chair, looked at my mom and said, “I believe you now.” For a divorce lawyer to be aghast at the kind of man my father is….He went through several lawyers. His first one refused to take his case she was disgusted. Good for her.

One day I think I will write a novel about it. The chronicles of a crazy man.

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