From 80 to below freezing

This weather is insane. How could we go from sweltering to freezing in 24 hours? Well. Obviously we can. I prefer winter temperatures during winter because, yeah, it’s winter. At least I was able to sleep relatively better. I swear it’s actually my hair preventing the good sleep, though. There’s a LOT of it right now. Driving me bonkers. Still, despite the freezing wind and cold temperatures, I spent the first half of the night (especially the initial 2 hours) in a deep sweat…like drenched in sweat as if I was going through hot flashes. Not a fun feeling. I suddenly started awake about an hour into sleeping swimming in my own sweat. This morning it was better because the house was very cold, but I was still battling my internal heat engine. Is it this new comforter I like so much? It was lava under the blankets and a glacier outside of it. Maybe something’s wrong with my body’s ability to maintain homeostasis? My bloodwork was fine last year. I will admit to skipping out on working out last night because I felt tired. The commute home was infuriating and then again so was work. Food wasn’t done until 8, the dogs didn’t want to eat, and 10pm came so fast. You know, maybe I was fighting off something? A co-worker was saying she thought she was getting sick and was getting fever chills. I felt a little funny/off myself but didn’t have time to dwell on it. Could’ve been a little bought of a fever, maybe like Gable had the other day?

Well one thing’s for sure: Liana has skipped out on coming into my room at night lately. Does it coincide with my vivid dreams, inability to sleep, etc? Stress levels? I’ve been on edge lately and yesterday I was filled with a wholly depressive feeling like something sad was about to happen. My sister and bro-in-law are going to visit his dad who has been very sick for a while. I’ll be heading down tomorrow to let my girl run and to give Gable something nice to look forward to. He managed to knock off the pad on the bottom of his “shoe” this morning. Or maybe it was cold? I can’t tell if it was before or after the walk as I found it in front of the door, but he did spend most of the walk hopping and not walking. I’d assumed it was just hurting him and this is the first time it didn’t use a gauze pad to cover the foot.

Speaking of which, I thought I’d gotten through to my mom about her hoarding and buying impractical things. For a while there we were really good. The pantry wasn’t overfilled, the fridge was good, the house looked overall clean, but guess what? Right back to it. Now on top of it all I’m trying to get her to do resistance training because her calcium levels are low and osteopenia and porosis are nothing to laugh at. I see lots of patients who are going through that and bisphosphonates are not ideal to have to take, you know? Not to mention expensive. Why not do the free and proactive thing by getting off her butt? Doesn’t take too long and it’ll make her feel better. She doesn’t DO much. For some reason she’s proud of not doing social stuff either. I feel like I spend more time reprimanding her than anything. I just saw her to clean her teeth this past Tuesday and told her she needs to use softpicks. Then I realized we’d just had this argument where she bought a ton of these white plastic toothpicks and I complained because they don’t work. She got all indignant and was like, I USE THESE ALL THE TIME. I go, well, I work with patients who use them too and guess what? THEY DON’T WORK WELL. I’d forgotten all about it until after I saw her for the appointment and there was a spot she said she always cleans out and I said it needs to be cleaned more.

Stuff like that makes me more want to get my own place and just exist on my own, but then there’s the other stuff like her cooking, my dogs having someone around, etc. I think I’ve given up on trying to find a detached home in my price range. I have NOTHING right now anyways money-wise. Speaking of which, let me do my taxes soon. Oh yeah…my hygiene license too.

On the plus side, my credit card was so happy I used so much money and am now in debt to them they doubled my credit limit. Whoo. -_-;;

M got his Valentine’s stuff yesterday. We’ve been trying to be more attentive to each other. Hanging on. I’ve been working hard on trying to remain as patient as possible. I can’t afford (literally and figuratively) to be so selfish anymore.

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