Growing up

I just put in my big girl pants and contacted my insurance company about life insurance! It wasn’t as scary as I thought it was going to be, but I made no commitment as of yet (complications) and am shopping other places too. Really gets you thinking when you sit in traffic most of the week, you know? Makes me more glad that I take the long way home where it’s more frustrating but less speed. I mean, I know I’m just as likely to get killed but I’m banking on the really aggressive people being on the high-speed route.

Saturday saw me NOT going south. Friday was a day of stomach issues and then lingering effects of that coupled with the forbidden eggs made for a ridiculous Saturday. Not to mention my muscles were still screaming from Thursday’s Wii U Fit shenanigans. Today they’re fine and I’m fine, but I may have waited too long to work out again. Sigh. Will do tonight though!!!!!!! I spent most of the day measuring the upstairs of the townhouse’s square footage to help make estimates for carpet replacement or hardwood floors. I can NOT believe how rusty my math has become, but it felt good to exert the gray matter in a way I’ve not in YEARS.

An observation on dogs: I had a fit of rage against them on Satuday because they refused to eat again. After all that shameful insanity, they surprised me by following me even more closely than normal instead of distancing themselves. I guess to them I was just exerting my authority? Maybe I’d been undermining myself a bit there. They would literally follow me around the house. As if I expected them to be at my beck and call. huh. I guess I’d not had a fit of rage like that since I’ve had 2 dogs.

Sunday had me on a rampage. After the illness of Saturday I was RARING to do something but had nothing to do, so I ended up tackling the nightmare coat closet no one’s attempted. It was full of empty boxes and plastic bags. So I got it cleared up, bought a 6 cube organizer thing at target, put it together and BOOM automatic organization! I have to say it looks fantastic in there! Very attractive, like it was a staged house closet. Of course we also have a mountain of recycle for today that I might have to break up into 2 weeks.

My brother has been escaping to the south EVERY weekend. I think he’s really wanting to branch out, but not at the exact same time. The pull is really pulling though. My mom is still in denial about the fact that we’re all going to leave her at some point. I keep telling her to go find a date or a roommate or something, but it’s a sore spot for her. She just vehemently adamant that there’s no way in the world she could be happy with another man. While that’s totally fine, I argue back that how in the world would she know unless she opens herself up to it. She loves those sappy, perfect Hallmark movies, so I know that she believes it deep down. If not a man, then her friends. Then she insists that she’d happily live by herself and I call that bluff, because she’s many times told me how sad she is when no ones home…especially the dogs. We are far from my dad now, but I often see how far his emotional abuse dug in. She often says things like, “it’s too far” when I say we should go here. But it’s NOT. Just about 20 minutes. My dad would often say that when he didn’t want anyone to go anywhere fun…like visiting my mom’s parents, or the beach. On the other hand, he could and did travel far away places frequently. She often thinks things are “too expensive” when they’re really not once you consider the labor added otherwise. Another of his excuses for not allowing us on field trips or vacations or having things that we wanted (never anything crazy, mind you). When you think about it things really don’t cost THAT much. People who make much less money than we do/did still manage to afford things we were refused. You make money, why not use it? Saving is fantastic, but you are allowed to use it to have fun. We weren’t allowed to go be with friends either, so now she still refuses even when there’s an opportunity. You know, I used to and sometimes still feel that way, but I have the benefit of youth and rebellion on my side. I’ve pointed these things out to her many times, so I hope she takes it in.

Speaking of working on my mom, another habit she has is cluttering and light hoarding. See closet makeover. I’ve been slowly but surely making great progress with that. She’s starting to really come around to de-cluttering the house. Mostly I just do things and she complains but sees how nice the end result is. Not to mention the waste of money we have by having useless things around for no reason. I can be manipulative, but in this case I don’t call it that. I call it light intervention, lol, because the end result is for the better. We can have guests come without being too ashamed for one thing, less stuff for the dogs to get into, and even more importantly, clearing out the environment should go a long way in allowing the mind to open more. There are less things to focus on. Less oppression. Not to mention good on the allergies too when there’s less dust for things to settle on. It’s kind of like having constant inflammation. Aggravating to the human body, and in this case the brain. You find things you’ve been missing (I FOUND MY DREMEL ATTACHMENTS FINALLY) and see exactly how large the house is.

It didn’t even look this good when we first bought the house! You can see floor! People can fit in it!

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Haha. Part of it is now that I can’t buy things for my house, I have to buy something for some house. I swear it’s a primal biological thing. It’s like I can’t be happy unless I’ve done something to make the house look nice. Do other females feel this way??????

For some reason my feet smell really bad lately. Apparently Brevibacterium linens, Proprionibacterium or Staphylococcus epidermis  is to blame. Even though Brevibacteria is said to be the major problem in most foot odors, my microbiology class grew some Proprionibacteria and Staph epidermis and I was highly struck by how Proprioni smelled like my feet sometimes. It’s the same smell now! How cool would it be to have my own microscope and see for myself?! Then cause an epidemic of an aggressive super bacterium. Anyhoos, I’m not sure why after all these years, the smell has come back.



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