…Apparently we did so much today that I feel like the weekend’s over? geez.
We had a big day today, going down to Richmond. Woke up pretty early to do that (6:45) and took the drive down, went Kroger-ing (AUGH I miss Kroger soooo much!), I closed my bank account, went and saw my sister’s new place, went out to eat, went to Fresh Market and then took a really scenic route back home. It took almost double the time to get back (avoiding all highways), but I love those windy, rural side roads. Ever since I took so many of them in school on rotation, nothing makes me happier so far than being able to drive fast on a windy, tree-lined road with pratically no traffic at all. We got so close to the Blue Ridge Mountatins you could see them, and I added some new roadage to the map in my brain. Turns out that Staples Mill Road (plus a few turns here and there) connects to Route 29. I’d always wondered what was out that-a-ways!!! Makes me happy. We then ate a light dinner and watched TV: Die Hard 2 and The Expendables.
I’d been wanting to watch The Expendables because of the fact that it’s pure action as well as there were some nice cameos and inclusions of famous action actors. The one I really wanted to see was Jet Li. BIIIIIIIG Jet Li and Jackie Chan films–and inevitably–their style of film and fighting. The big 3 in the film was supposed to be Sylvester Stallone (SS), Jason Statham (JS), and Jet Li.
SS was as I expected. Old. Scary looking from all that plastic surgery and too much makeup. Slow. But he’s supposed to be the oldest of the team, and the leader, someone everyone relies on to form the plan and go with things.
JS was as expected too. He’s younger, cool, hot-tempered, hero, defends the ladies, who gets things done. In the movie he uses these throwing knives, and honestly he is portrayed in the movie as the most able-bodied, the awesomest, the most successful fighter. The guy every boy wants to aspire to be. [personally, I do no like Jason Statham movies in general. They’re untasteful and poorly choreographed]
Now to Jet Li. As a part of the big 3, he’s supposed to be in with them, right? There’s this running gag/complaint in the movie that he has to work harder because he’s smaller than everyone. That’s fine and good. As the big 3 he’s supposed to be up there in terms of ability to deliver. Um. Not the freakin’ case in this movie. I was very very disappointed. Already in the opening of the movie (which was very hard to see with the lighting and camera angles) he was beaten up and had to be saved by leader SS. Ok, cool, maybe he’s just a lackey. Then later he establishes himself as one of the big 3 because he “believes” in the leader and goes with him. Turns out he just wants money for this really confusing bit about a family and money and not a real family and money. You don’t get it, I don’t get it either. That action sequence has him shooting from the back of a pickup at these cars that are trying to kill them. His shots never really hit anything and he gets thrown around a lot instead. Then the moment of truth: the guy he got beaten up by in the beginning gets another go at him. Oh awesome, see my Jet Li CAN work with the big boys. No. After some good hits, he gets beaten up AGAIN and has to be saved by SS AGAIN. uuurgh. Then later in the big last battle, he gets owned AGAIN and has to be helped. And then he just kind of dissolves into a lackey at the end again. Wait. Lackey? I thought he was one of the main guys? Confused? YES. Any closure for the little asian man? NO, dangit.
Confused and sorely frustrated for him. Granted this type of shoot-em-up movie is not his style, so there was really no place for him. Indeed, it was almost painful to watch him use a gun to kill 99% of the people (which was like a total of 3), because we all know Jet Li’s specialty is martial arts (he got to kill 1 person that way). But really??? Everyone else was so freakin cool! Even that weird guy with the cauliflower ear? GOSH. The movie was already bad as it was (were you really expecting it to be good, though the grit was pretty neato. The plot was very very thin and the dialogue was crap.) and it didn’t help itself at all by having Jet Li be pretty much the most useless person on the team. I half think they put him in the movie for racial balance and bringing in viewers who would otherwise never watch.
OK. Done rant. After I watch, my mom who has already seen it, asks me what ended up happening to Jet Li. She kept insisting that he died and I have no idea what she’s talking about. She is right about him just kind of fading away at the end, though.
Tomorrow’s itinerary: house tours. Then cleaning my room and cleaning up a bit. The grandparent’s come back Monday night.