Things that go squash in the night

More amazing accounts of the human body: I was sleeping last night and my dream-self felt something her neck that was very inconsistent with the dream’s logical (if you can call dreams logical) flow, so my brain was like, "that’s not right!! WAKE UP!" My suddenly conscious brain immediately pinpointed the source of alarm on the back of my neck and initiated a nerve cascade that swung my arm up, back and out. With one swipe I had killed the bug, but it was still squished on the back of my neck, so a series of swipes later it was all gone. THe spot still held a burning sensation, but the bug was gone. I wiped at my bed a little before sleepiness took over again and I fell back to sleep, smack back into my dream. Apparently you can disrupt REM sleep and continue it right away.

The next morning I woke up find telltale legs on my bed which pinpointed only one bug: house centipedes or as we lovingly call them: million leggers. If you’ve ever squashed one of these things you find out quick that they disintegrate into nothingness–like dust. Not like spiders that just sit there, squished. Well, at least it was a million legger instead of a spider. I’ve had an orb weaver on my neck once; it wasn’t really fun.

So stupid VCU messed up my transcript so the VA board of dentistry sent me a thing that said "The transcript you submitted from VCU does not show where you were awarded your degree in Dental Hygiene. Please send us your final transcript." If you think about the first sentence, it doesn’t really make sense. But it’s obvious that VCU sent some other transcript and not the original. I was going to go down there, but I hate going down to VCU, so i figured I should just call them after I figure out what the heck went wrong with the first one I sent.


Here is one of the legs I found on my bed after waking up.


2 thoughts on “Things that go squash in the night

  1. i know for a fact that bugs crawl over me when i sleep, but i just pretend that it doesn’t happen…
    once i spent the night with a wolf spider while i was camping. it was fascinating, yet kind of gross at the same time.


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