Is it revelation time?

I was sitting there in the process of inking some more of my sketches (I’m on 7 of 11!! Whooo!!) and in trying to ignore my aching fingers and big fat butt (ironically I’m wearing my Pokewalker, so talk about guilt for not moving around more) it suddenly dawned on me exactly how much money I don’t have and need in order to continue living like I always have.

Since I no longer have health insurance, I was looking at vision insurance (of medical, dental and vision, vision is the most pressing and important to me) and realized that if I bought that at it’s present premium, I would almost max out the limit on my credit card (it’s low because I don’t have a job currently) and halve the amount I have in my checking account. My DH license application and fees pretty much destroyed me this time around. And even if I got the insurance, I still need money to pay for my inevitable new glasses. I also need to buy malpractice insurance whenever I get my license number. @_@ And to make matters worse, if I were to leave home now, I need to also purchase car insurance (hey noVA IS 100 miles from here…) as well as pay my dad for my car.

This is all very possible. I just need to do a couple things: leave my dad a note asking if that truly is my car (he takes money in and out of the accounts, so I dunno. But I highly doubt that it’s mine because he likes that car alot) and if it’s not, I’ll tell him to take the amount from my account whenever my CD expires (next year); I need to finally delve into my savings account. I promised myself that I’d never touch this unless I absolutely had to. This looks like one of those times; find a decent, yet affordable car insurance; aaaaaaaaaaaand most importantly: GET A JOB.

Yesterday, today, the day before that…I’ve been saying all week that I’m going to spend this week looking for a job. What ended up happening was that I would find any and all excuses not to. Even this morning. I actually told myself that I’d do it next week. WUUT?? 

This sudden-inking-revelation awoke in me the exact reason why I need to. I think my classmate sending me a ton of texts helped alot in moving me along. She made me think. She said this in her text: “I feel useless around the house.” My response was “I rather enjoy being a bum,” but upon scrutiny, I…don’t. 3 weeks has been plenty of time for a break after school. Let’s face it; my brain is bored. My body is bored. When I lose myself in a good book or a good game or tell myself that I’ll start looking after I finish the entire inking process, it makes sense in my brain. I think I’m finally ready to move on. The last time this happened to me was in high school: people nagged and nagged some more about me getting a job and I hated it so I didn’t. It wasn’t until I realized that I was truly bored and I needed to move on (and people stopped nagging) that I took the initiative. And lo and behold, the first place I applied to accepted me. 

It also helps to realize exactly how much I’m turning into my brother, hiding in my room all day, not really wanting to do much of anything. I mean, I was surprised when I finally came out of my room this morning to see that he’s at work. !_! 

I’m nervous yet again about looking for a job, being turned down, going for interviews, and then how I”m going to support myself when I’m up in NoVA (I don’t want to bum off my grandparents!!!!! at all!!!), but as Rafiki in The Lion King once said: “It is time!!”

<phone ring> dang telemarketers.

I’m going to discuss this with my mama, but the first step needs to be taken and it’s: dip into savings and get those new glasses.


GET A JOB. See? I’m my own nagger.


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